Change 101: How to Handle the Changes that Come Your Way

One of the few things that are constant in this world is change. At the same time, many people just don’t like change. As a matter of fact, the only person I know that always likes change is a wet baby!
Having said that, I believe that most people do not like change because they either don’t know how to respond to it, or respond poorly.

One way to think about this is that change is like waves on the beach. Just like change, waves are relentless, can be very powerful, and there’s really only three things you can do with a wave: let it knock you down, survive it, or ride it.

Let’s take a closer look at each of these three ways to handle change.

Letting it knock you down
We let the waves of change knock us down when we take what I call the “dead roach approach” to change. That is, flat on our back, feet in the air, and just let it take control.

You can tell you are taking this approach when you say things like:
“I’m so stressed out!”
“I can’t take this!”
“This isn’t fair.”
“Why does this always have to happen to me?”

Surviving it
Doesn’t surviving change sound like a good thing to want to do? While in a few cases it’s really the only thing you can do, it really isn’t the optimal approach to take. I don’t know about you, but merely surviving doesn’t sound like a very compelling way to live to me.

If you’re thinking and saying these things, you’ve probably settled on merely surviving:
How can I get through this?
What’s the worst that could happen here?
I don’t know if I can take this.
What can I do to get by?
The problem with taking a survival approach is that you just merely get by. When you’re ready to do more than just get by, it’s time to begin.........

Riding it
Riding the waves of change means moving from a state of survival to a state I call “thrival.” Thrival is simply the process of making change work for you.

Here are some questions to ask to begin to learn how to thrive on change:
How can I make this work for me?
What’s good about this?
What does this change allow me to do that I couldn’t do before?
What positive things might this change force me to do that I might not have thought of doing before?
Since life has handed me a lemon, how can I make lemonade?

Change is inevitable. How we handle it is optional. Make the choice to ride the waves and you’re likely to create a compelling life for yourself. Article Source: http://www.bigarticle.com/

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How to Make Great Decisions in Life: Top 5 Practical Insights

Making great decisions can be tricky: there are many hidden traps and potential roadblocks you need to be aware of. Here are 5 practical, actionable insights to help you make the best possible decisions to improve your life.

How much is a gallon of water worth?

Well, if you’re reading this, you can probably get a gallon of water for pennies from your kitchen tap. Yet, if you were dying of thirst in a desert, you’d happily pay a hundred bucks for it, right? On the other hand, you’d pay a hundred bucks an hour for a plumber to avoid the water being there in the first place (in your flooded basement, that is).

Many people believe value is intrinsic to an object. Sure, water is water is water, but its value varies enormously depending on what you need it for.

Decision making is a very personal business — it’s about assessing what’s valuable to you. There’s no absolute best job, best car or best life to be lived: value is in the eye of the decision maker.

Always decide on your own. Sure, factor in other people’s opinions, but bear in mind that they may value things (very) differently. Blindly following other people’s advice may lead to disastrous decisions — even if they are based on “sound” advice from people with the best intentions of helping you.

As we’ve seen in insight #1 above, no decision outcomes are intrinsically ‘good’ or ‘bad’ — the outcome depends on who you ask, and there are never absolute answers. How do you make sure you’re making the best decision for your life, then?

It may sound obvious at first, but it all boils down to your goals — knowing what you want out of the decision.But establishing a clear picture of your goals for decision making is not always trivial, and I don’t think people invest enough time to do it properly. Consider this dialogue from the book Making Great Decisions in Business and in Life:

Salesman: Hey, want to buy an elephant for $800?
Passerby: No, thanks.
Salesman: How about an elephant for $500?
Passerby: No! What would I do with an elephant? Come on, I live in an apartment.
Salesman: You drive a hard bargain. How about two elephants for $500?
Passerby: Make it $400 and you’ve got a deal.

The point is clear: if you have no use for an elephant (or for the latest shiny gadget, if you will), it will never be a good deal now matter how little you pay for it (unless you plan to make a profit reselling it, of course).

Be clear about your goals before deciding. A great way to ensure you carefully consider your goals before deciding is by using the PrOACT approach, which is a great, structured way of making decisions.

Beware of doing the wrong comparisons. To assess how valuable something is to you, the only comparison you should make is how it ties in with your objectives. If you don’t need, say, that latest phone in the first place, it’s meaningless to compare it with the model you already have, or with its “light” or “premium” versions! For more on how comparisons can lead you astray, check The Relativity Mind Trap.

Many people see decision making as an analytical process that, if done right, is guaranteed to lead to nice outcomes. They believe that if they just think hard and long enough, great outcomes will result from their decisions.

The truth is: no matter how much effort you put in, no decision outcome can be better than the best alternative you considered. And no amount of analysis or systematic thinking will change that.

Having a good amount of alternatives to explore and choose from, then, is essential for making great decisions. If you’re having a hard time deciding, it doesn’t mean you’re a poor decision maker: most likely you’re just out of decent alternatives.

Generate many alternatives. Before jumping in and deciding among just two or three options that first come to mind, spend time generating plenty of new alternatives. Use idea-generation techniques, such as lists of 100 or SCAMPER. Set yourself idea quotas. Don’t be shy about flexing your brainstorming muscles.

The more important a decision is, the more time you should spend on it. ‘Duh, that’s just common sense’, you say. Well, just like with many other things in life, common sense does not equal common practice.

Here’s what often happens: we spend time on decisions not based on how important they are, but on how difficult they are. These are two very different concepts. Let me illustrate.

Suppose you’re buying a car, and you’re torn between two very similar models: One has slightly better transmission, but the other has a slightly better engine. One is slightly cheaper, but the other is slightly more reliable. You see, it’s a decision that is hard to analyze, with many complex tradeoffs!

Yes, it sure is a hard decision… but that doesn’t mean it’s an important one! After all, you’re probably going to be fine with either car as the differences are minimal.

The closest your alternatives are, the harder it is to decide. And, perversely, the less relevant your decision will be one way or another!

As a wise decision-maker, you will realize that if alternatives are very close to each other in value, it matters less which one you picks. You should save your energy for more important decisions — those with very different payoffs.

Pay attention to “hard” decisions. When you can’t make up your mind between two choices, chances are that they’re so similar that it doesn’t matter which one you pick. See if the tradeoffs you’re considering match your decision objectives (see insight #2 above).Agree on a decision deadline. If you still find yourself bogged down on a decision of borderline importance, set a fixed block of time aside and agree to have the decision made at the end of it no matter what. Can’t really make up your mind for such a minimal difference? Toss a coin at the last second if necessary.

Making great decisions is a process that involves many unique and diametrically-opposite “thinking modes”. For instance, to generate good alternatives, you must be creative and non-judgmental. But to ultimately make up your mind, you need to be judgmental. Knowing when to switch thinking modes is important, and it’s too easy to get it wrong.

In that context, I strongly advise that you see the decision making process as a chain of separate steps. Isolate each step, going into different thinking modes in turn in order to make the best possible decision.

There you go. Here are the 5 insights that always help me make better decisions. What do you think about them? Do you have any additional ones that you try to keep in mind when making decisions? Share them in the comments!

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